You Are the Ego

You take a balanced approach to your life. You definitely aren't afraid to act out on your desires - even crazy ones. But you usually think first. Morals drive you as much as hedonism does. You've been able to live a life of pleasure... without living a life of excess.

I don't know..... As much as I do have a need for balance in my life, sometimes... SOMETIMES I wish for a different outcome. There are times I want that feeling that only something off color, something with a whole lot of punch, something that reminds me of the feeling of flying once again. Sometimes, no... often... I fear now the possible consequences, so I hold back and take the safe route. I mean really, who wants to take the rap for bad decisions, negative circumstances, the chaos that you could have prevented by just playing it a little safe? (sighs and rolls eyes....) But it's not just me who is effected by my decisions, but my WHOLE Family!!!!

At the same time, the edge of excitement, the lure of the unknown, the thrill of the chase, the fluttering down in my stomach that wants to spread out into every fiber of my being... It's been calling more lately than usual. After all, as the saying goes, a well behaved woman rarely makes history. And although I don't exactly want center stage, I do want to somehow be able to life a full, rich and intense life. There's a definite lack of adventure and passion in my life. I just have to figure out how to bring that element back in without it effecting anyone else.

Therein lies a great deal of frustration.....







Cheers! ~MacKenzie

Recovering from 17 inches of snow is really a rather daunting task!!! We are used to the snow, but the snow from yesterday practically matched the amount we got for last year's winter season. Truly amazing. Yesterday I knew a storm was approaching, but I had NO idea we would get so much. The wind blew massive drifts around the house. After the drifting and plowing the snow out of the way, the snow bank is over the railing around the front porch. If I were to try and step out on the back porch, the snow would be about knee deep on me.

Poor Honey, after he went out to help Papa clean up all the agency properties, he was tired! But before he took all his winter gear off, I needed him to go around back because I feared that the dryer vent along the back was covered over. The back yard is a big field and there was nothing to stop the drifting except the house. So after he shoveled that out, he noticed that our small satellite dish was also snow covered. He figured he didn't have anything to loose at that point and trudged through the biggest drift on the property. I asked him to please not trip because if he fell into the drift, I'd probably not find him until spring. It was up past his waist.



You know how sometimes something just happens that just gives you the shivers??? The girls were in the sunroom this morning, Honey with Papa and I was getting ready to do some laundry. I began to throw the clothes in the washer when suddenly I looked down and... no wedding rings. Unfortunately, Blogstream doesn't have a panic face, but that is certainly what would be next. What the??? Where's my???? Oh No!!! I thought for sure that they were on before I started the laundry because I'm always playing with them.

Piece by piece, I slowly took each towel out of the washer, shook it and then moved on to the next one. Towards the bottom I found my wedding band. Thank goodness. Okay, finally I was able to breathe once again. The engagement ring had to be in there somewhere. I pulled EVERYTHING out and had to sweep around the whole bottom in order to find and grab the other ring. 10 minutes later I was leaning against the kitchen cabinets, listening to the hum of the washer and suddenly I just got a violent chill that seemed to start at my toes and end at the tips of my hair leaving me with the oddest feeling of... dread. Of course, then the imagination takes over. I was never so happy to see Honey walk through the door later this morning.

Why do you suppose things like that happen? Nothing was wrong. And it wasn't like I didn't find the rings.... I don't know... I just find things like that odd. As if I didn't have enough to think about than why odd occurrences happen...




Cheers! ~MacKenzie

My interest is in the future because I am going to spend the rest of my life there. ~Charles F. Kettering

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars. ~Les Brown







Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember, all things are possible for those who believe. ~Gail Devers

You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream. ~C.S. Lewis

And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. ~Abraham Lincoln



Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow." ~Mary Anne Radmacher

There are no failures- just experiences and your reactions to them. ~Tom Krause

Chase down your passion like it's the last bus of the night. ~Glade Byron Addams



Every day is a new beginning. Treat it that way. Stay away from what might have been, and look at what can be. ~Marsha Petrie Sue

Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step. ~Martin Luther King, Jr.

A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step. ~Lao-Tsu



Cheers! ~MacKenzie

There is probably nothing I would like more right now than to have a quiet, restful next few days. I would just love to see the old year pass peacefully. In fact, I do believe that probably the very last thing I want to do is be in the midst of people, of noise, of the chaos that almost always follows when the family gets together.

And it isn't like I don't absolutely love them. Honey's aunts and uncles and cousins are absolutely wonderful. I enjoy being around them! I enjoy their company. They are great people. However, I'm just not in the mood to be around everyone at this particular time. I'd like to have a different kind of New Year celebration this year.

Soft. Quiet. Maybe staring at the stars, listening to any night sounds that might be out and about. Maybe just sitting snuggled up on the couch listening to music.



Hmmm.... seeing as I'm just not going to have the moment that I would prefer, I wonder how good of an actress I can become? I hate acting. I hate feeling one thing and doing another. Unfortunately, if you try to sneak off, people seem to take it the wrong way. Ah well... watcha gonna do????

So here's my smiley face
What do you think? Will it pass?








Cheers! ~MacKenzie

The White Stripes- In the Cold, Cold Night



I saw you standing in the corner
On the edge of a burning light
I saw you standing in the corner
Come to me again in the cold, cold night

You make me feel a little older
Like a full grown woman might
But when you're gone I grow colder
Come to me again in the cold, cold night

I see you walking by my front door
I hear the creaking of the kitchen floor
I don't care what other people say
I'm going to love you, anyway
Come to me again in the cold, cold night

I can't stand it any longer
I need the fuel to make my fire burn bright
So don't fight it any longer
Come to me again in the cold, cold night

And I know that you feel it too
When my skin turns into glue
You will know that it's warm inside
And you'll come run to me, in the cold, cold night

Hooray, it's Saturday!!!

Cheers! ~MacKenzie